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Night_Hawk

Siasat.pk - Blogger
[h=1]REVIEW: Sociological web: The Upstairs Wife by Rafia Zakaria[/h]
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AS her memoir-cum-history book demonstrates, respected Pakistani columnist Rafia Zakaria possesses a decided gift with words. Based on the sad story of her aunt, Amina, the book chronicles the manner in which Amina attempts to cope with her husband Sohail’s second marriage. Interwoven with her story is an elegantly written macrocosmic narrative of the history of Karachi — the complex city that houses countless women who suffer domestic unhappiness.



The Upstairs Wife: An Intimate History of Pakistan is recounted by Amina’s niece, whose blood relative, her uncle Sohail, makes a pleasant and conventional marriage in the early ‘70s with a woman whom he finds attractive, and with whom he may have been compatible. Part of the couple’s personal tragedy is that they are unable to have children. Although monetarily far from destitute, both Amina and, to a less obvious extent, Sohail, suffer from varying degrees of depression due to this emptiness in their lives. Sohail seeks solace in making a second marriage, but does not relinquish his first wife, who is relegated to occupying the uppermost floor of their multi-level house, while her rival is ensconced on the first floor.



Readers will find it difficult to judge Sohail, not least because Zakaria does an admirably thorough job of detailing Pakistan’s religious and sociological stances towards polygamy in Islam. Although firmly and sympathetically feminist, she is rarely overbearing in her critiques. Neither does she need to be, since Amina’s story — even though presented from her niece’s perspective — conveys enough of the natural pathos that a woman feels on being sidelined by a matrimonial rival.



Zakaria demonstrates particular deftness at portraying society on both a private as well as a more public level. The author is as successful in describing Amina’s wedding, or the upstairs wife’s wretchedness at being constantly reminded by semi-malicious busybodies that she is barren, as she is at giving one glimpses into the more overarching sociopolitical concerns of the country. The Ojhri camp explosions, the Swat earthquake, and the fatal Bushra Zaidi bus accident are movingly described, for instance. But tragedy aside, the writer’s affection for the city of Karachi is evident in the close attention paid to detailing the historic landscape of the city, as Zakaria moves with almost panoramic grace through describing the aging of Saddar, the importance of Clifton, and the burgeoning middle-class milieu of Gulshan-e-Iqbal.



It would not be far-fetched to note that few Pakistani writers possess as strong a command over transferring the power of the visual into words as Zakaria does. Metaphoric, but pithy, her writing fuses image and sentiment in a manner that is both convincing and aesthetically pleasing, as the following quote denotes: “Pakeezah, or ‘pure woman,’ was a digest containing serialised stories to which my grandmother and Aunt Amina shared a subscription. It was a densely packed volume, its miniscule print cramming thousands of Urdu words onto its pages like all the angry wives of the city suddenly letting go. There were no pictures inside, but the cover always caught my attention and held it. It was invariably a painted portrait of a beautiful woman with a distressed expression.”



The narrator’s grandmother alluded to in this passage, Surraya, is Sohail’s mother whose story is also fluidly recounted in personal segments of the narrative. However, the main focus of the book remains the wronged wife, or perhaps more accurately the wife who believes herself to be wronged.

For while there is no doubt that Zakaria is personally sympathetic to Amina’s position, she does not mince words when it comes to detailing the cold, mechanical aspects of sociological issues, including not just polygamy but also the Hudood Ordinance, and cases where wives did not even realise that divorces had to be filed in court to be considered binding and legal.



I am hard-pressed to find a flaw in this remarkable and touching book but if there is one it has to do with unevenness of assessment. By ‘assessment’ I mean the internal machinations whereby Zakaria comments on major public figures such as the Zardari couple among others. A great fuss was made about the famous diamond necklace apparently placed by Benazir and her husband in Switzerland, allegedly bought as Zakaria notes, with Pakistani taxpayers’ money.



However, while recounting the problematic aspects of this, the writer herself notes that the full story may never be known. While this is a realistic enough statement, it strikes a jarring note in a book that is otherwise rather seamless in the manner in which it assesses and recounts things.



In certain cases, such as the narratives of Amina and Surraya, perhaps it does not really matter if the full story is not known — and one must add that it would have been especially interesting to get more on Sohail’s perspective than we are offered. Towards the end of the tale we realise some of what Zakaria refers to as the “venom” at the root of the couple’s tensions. But there exists a decided disparity between incomplete personal narratives and incomplete political ones that the writer is not able to negotiate satisfactorily. However, ultimately this is just a minor problem in a sensitively written book that readers on a global level will be able to laud and appreciate.

http://www.dawn.com/news/1181140
 

jonny

Banned
The crowd gives us so much energy and we are able to really feed off of it. Hitting those shots and having the crowd go crazy helps boost our confidence. We love our fans.
 

Quora1

Banned
For new book a long queues for whole night to buy.Y people love so much to Rolling' books? If any one wana earn so much money write some story book

what is special in Hrry potter , Ali Baba and Umero Ayair story books r much better than harry poter??
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Harry Potter and the endless queues: Fans flock to snap up first copies of JK Rowling's new book that continues the story 19 years later








For many a Harry Potter fan, last night was an event that they had only been able to dream of for nine years.
Since the last installment of the series - Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - was released in 2007, its author JK Rowling had always insisted that heartbroken fans had seen the last of the boy wizard and his best friends Ron and Hermione after they succesfully vanquished his nemesis Voldemort.
But that all changed last year when it was announced that a two-part play - Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - was to premiere in London's Palace Theatre.
The script for the new play - which follows both Harry's career and marriage post Hogwarts, as well as imagining how his children cope at the famous wizarding school - was finally released to exuberant fans at the stroke of midnight this morning.
And just as they had done for previous installments of the series, many of them - now excitable adults - queued patiently in London, New York and Sydney to be among the first to get their hands on the script.
The script is written by acclaimed playwright Jack Thorne, but is based on a new story by JK Rowling - who celebrates her 51st birthday today, the same day as Harry himself.
And the play, which had its official premiere last night after several weeks of previews, has won rave reviews by critics and audience members alike.
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Magical: Hundreds of fans patiently queue up in Piccadilly, London to receive their copy of the latest Harry Potter adventure - Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

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Patient: Queues at the Waterstones in Piccadilly snaked around the street, with many sleep parents accompanying their eager children

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Long awaited: Copies of the book ready for sale in New York City after fans underwent a months-long wait to get their hands on the script

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Around the world: Queues snake out of the door in Barnes and Noble as fans prepare for the latest Harry Potter script to be released

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Costume: Many fans dressed for the occasion as their favourite characters in the book. A woman chose a Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans costume (left) while her friend dressed as Albus Dumbledore's Chocolate Frog card (right)

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Twins: Two little boys dressed as the famously cheeky Weasley twins Fred and George as they queued up to buy their copies of the script

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Global: Thousands of people congregated outside the Lello bookstore in Porto, Northern Portugal, to get their hands on the new script

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Purchase: One fan, dressed as a Gryffindor schoolgirl, pays for her copy of the new script in New York

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Flying off the shelves: Millions of copies of the script are expected to be sold world-wide over the coming few weeks

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All grown up: Many of the fans who once queued up to buy the books as children are now adults - but just as excited for the new release

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Long-awaited: One woman picks up her copy of the new play at the Lello book store in Portugal

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Boxes: Packages of the books were delivered to book stores across the world - with a strict embargo of 12:01am this morning

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Fans dressed as their favourite characters from the series in celebration: (left-right) Hagrid, Dobby the house-elf and Professor Pomona Sprout unpotting a mandrake

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One young fan - complete with lightning bolt scar - looked utterly thrilled to get her hands on the new script

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Two dans clad in Gryffindor costumes grin as they begin to read their new copies of the book

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Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...play-imagines-wizard-adult.html#ixzz4G1cgrlZ2
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Saba Malik

Voter (50+ posts)
Jee Chahta Hain Tum Se Pyari Si Baat Ho,
Haseen Chand Tare Ho, Lambi Si Raat Ho,
Fir Raat Bhar Yhi Guftagu Rakhe Hum Dono,
Tum Meri Zindagi Ho, Tum Meri Kayinat Ho.
 

shaikh

Minister (2k+ posts)
"Books fatal to their authors" by P.H.Ditchfield : Excerpt about GALILEO

[h=1]GALILEO

Excerpt from :

BOOKS FATAL TO THEIR AUTHORS[/h] [h=2]By P. H. Ditchfield[/h]


The book is very exhaustive of accounts of people who faced persecution or death or exile becuase what they wrote . Interesting but needs interest and patience to understand.



The treatment which Galileo received at the hands of the ecclesiastics of his day is well known. This father of experimental philosophy was born at Pisa in 1564, and at the age of twenty-four years, through the favour of the Medicis, was elected Professor of Mathematics at the University of the same town. Resigning his chair in 1592, he became professor at Padua, and then at Florence. He startled the world by the publication of his first book, Sidereus Nuntius, in which he disclosed his important astronomical discoveries, amongst others the satellites of Jupiter and the spots on the sun. This directed the attention of the Inquisition to his labours, but in 1632 he published his immortal work Dialogo sopra i due Massimi Sistemi del monda, Tolemaico et Copernicano (Florence), which was the cause of his undoing. In this book he defended the opinion of Copernicus concerning the motion of the earth round the sun, which was supposed by the theologians of the day to be an opinion opposed to the teaching of Holy Scripture and subversive of all truth. The work was brought before the Inquisition at Rome, and condemned by the order of Pope Urban VIII. Galileo was commanded to renounce his theory, but this he refused to do, and was cast into prison. "Are these then my judges?" he exclaimed when he was returning from the presence of the Inquisitors, whose ignorance astonished him. There he remained for five long years; until at length, wearied by his confinement, the squalor of the prison, and by his increasing years, he consented to recant his "heresy," and regained his liberty. The old man lost his sight at seventy-four years of age, and died four years later in 1642. In addition to the work which caused him so great misfortunes he published Discorso e Demonstr. interna alle due nuove Scienze, Delia Scienza Meccanica (1649), Tractato della Sfera (1655); and the telescope, the isochronism of the vibrations of the pendulum, the hydrostatic balance, the thermometer, were all invented by this great leader of astronomical and scientific discoverers. Many other discoveries might have been added to these, had not his widow submitted the sage's MSS. to her confessor, who ruthlessly destroyed all that he considered unfit for publication. Possibly he was not the best judge of such matters!


Source : http://www.gutenberg.org/files/8485/8485-h/8485-h.htm#link2HCH0008
 

shaikh

Minister (2k+ posts)
Enjoyable description of japanese boys and girls in 1908 by John Finnimore

[h=3]Comments : presented is a wonderful description of boys and girls of japan by John Finnemore in 1908 , Enjoy it .

BOYS AND GIRLS IN JAPAN[/h] In no country in the world do children have a happier childhood than in Japan. Their parents are devoted to them, and the children are always good. This seems a great deal to say, but it is quite true. Japanese boys and girls behave as quietly and with as much composure as grown-up men and women. From the first moment that it can understand anything, a Japanese baby is taught to control its feelings. If it is in pain or sad, it is not to cry or to pull an ugly face; that would not be nice for other people to hear or see. If it is very merry or happy, it is not to laugh too loudly or to make too much noise; that would be vulgar. So the Japanese boy or girl grows up very quiet, very gentle, and very polite, with a smile for everything and everybody.


While they are little they have plenty of play and fun when they are not in school. In both towns and villages the streets are the playground, and here they play ball, or battledore and shuttlecock, or fly kites.


Almost every little girl has a baby brother or sister strapped on her back, for babies are never carried in the arms in Japan except by the nurses of very wealthy people. The baby is fastened on its mother's or its sister's shoulders by a shawl, and that serves it for both cot and cradle. The little girl does not lose a single scrap of her play because of the baby. She runs here and there, striking with her battledore, or racing after her friends, and the baby swings to and fro on her shoulders, its little head wobbling from side to side as if it were going to tumble off. But it is perfectly content, and either watches the game with its sharp little black eyes, or goes calmly off to sleep.


In the form of their dress both boys and girls appear alike, and, more than that, they are dressed exactly like their parents. There is no child's dress in Japan. The garments are smaller, to fit the small wearers--that is all.
The main article of dress is a loose gown, called a kimono. Under the outer kimono is an inner kimono, and the garments are girt about the body with a large sash, called an obi. The obi is the pride of a Japanese girl's heart. If her parents are rich, it will be of shining costly silk or rich brocade or cloth of gold; if her parents are poor, they will make an effort to get her one as handsome as their means will allow. Next to her obi, she prides herself on the ornaments which decorate her black hair--fine hairpins, with heads of tortoiseshell or coral or lacquer, and hair-combs, all most beautifully carved.


A boy's obi is more for practical use, and is not of such splendour as his sister's. When he is very small, his clothes are of yellow, while his sister's are of red. At the age of five he puts on the hakama, and then he is a very proud boy. The hakama is a kind of trousers made of silk, and is worn by men instead of an under-kimono. At five years old a boy is taken to the temple to thank the gods who have protected him thus far; and as he struts along, and hears with joy his hakama rustling its stiff new silk beneath his kimono, he feels himself a man indeed, and that his babyhood of yesterday is left far behind.


Upon the feet are worn the tabi--thick white socks, which may be called foot-gloves, for there are separate divisions for the toes.


These serve both as stockings outside the house and slippers inside, for no boots are worn in a Japanese house. When a Japanese walks out, he slips his feet into high wooden clogs, and when he comes home he kicks off the clogs at the door, and enters his home in tabi alone. The reason for this we shall hear later on. In Japanese clothes there are no pockets. Whatever they need to carry with them is tucked into the sash or into the sleeves of the kimono. The latter are often very long, and afford ample room for the odds and ends one usually carries in the pocket.


But fine kimonos and rich obis are for the wealthy Japanese; the poor cannot afford them, and dress very simply. The coolie--the Japanese working man--goes almost naked in the warm weather, wearing only a pair of short cotton trousers, until he catches sight of a policeman, when he slips on his blue cotton coat, for the police have orders to see that he dresses himself properly. His wife wears a cotton kimono, and the pair of them can dress themselves handsomely--for coolies--from head to foot for a sum of 45 sen, which, taking the sen at a halfpenny, amounts to 1 S. 10-1/2d. in our money.



[h=2]CHAPTER III[/h] [h=3]BOYS AND GIRLS IN JAPAN (continued)[/h] When Japanese boys and girls go to school, they make very low bows to their teacher and draw in the breath with a buzzing sound. This is a sign of deep respect, and the teacher returns their politeness by making low bows to them. Then the children sit down and begin to learn their lessons.


Their books are very odd-looking affairs to us. Not only are they printed in very large characters, but they seem quite upside down. To find the first page you turn to the end of the book, and you read it backwards to the front page. Again, you do not read from left to right, as in our fashion, but from right to left. Nor is this all: for the lines do not run across the page, but up and down. Altogether, a Japanese book is at first a very puzzling affair. When the writing lesson comes, the children have no pens; they use brushes instead. They dip their brushes in the ink, and paint the words one under the other, beginning at the top right-hand corner and finishing at the bottom left-hand corner. If they have an address to write on an envelope, they turn that upside down and begin with the name of the country and finish with the name of the person--England, London, Kensington Gardens, Brown John Mr.


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THE WRITING LESSON


But Japanese children have quite as many things to learn at home as at school. At school they learn arithmetic, geography, history, and so on, just as children do in England, but their manners and their conduct towards other people are carefully drilled into them by their parents. The art of behaving yourself towards others is by no means an easy thing to learn in Japan. It is not merely a matter of good-feeling, gentleness, and politeness, as we understand it, but there is a whole complicated system of behaviour: how many bows to make, and how they should be made. There are different forms of salutation to superiors, equals, and inferiors. Different ranks of life have their own ways of performing certain actions, and it is said that a girl's rank may easily be known merely by the way in which she hands a cup of tea to a guest. From the earliest years the children are trained in these observances, and they never make a mistake.


The Japanese baby is taught how to walk, how to bow, how to kneel and touch the floor with its forehead in the presence of a superior, and how to get up again; and all is done in the most graceful manner and without disturbing a single fold in its kimono.


A child is taught very carefully how to wait on people, how to enter the room, how to carry a tray or bowl at the right height, and, above all, how to offer a cup or plate in the most dainty and correct style. One writer speaks of going into a Japanese shop to buy some articles he wanted. The master, the mistress, the children, all bent down before him. There was a two-year-old baby boy asleep on his sister's back, and he, too, was awakened and called upon to pay his respects to the foreign gentleman. He woke without a start or a cry, understood at once what was required of him, was set on his feet, and then proceeded to make his bows and to touch the ground with his little forehead, just as exactly as his elder relatives. This done, he was restored once more to the shawl, and was asleep again in a moment.


The art of arranging flowers and ornaments is another important branch of a girl's home education. Everything in a Japanese room is carefully arranged so that it shall be in harmony with its surroundings. The arrangement of a bunch of flowers in a fine porcelain jar is a matter of much thought and care. Children are trained how to arrange blossoms and boughs so that the most beautiful effect may be gained, and in many Japanese houses may be found books which contain rules and diagrams intended to help them in gaining this power of skilful arrangement. This feeling for taste and beauty is common to all Japanese, even the poorest. A well-known artist says: "Perhaps, however, one of the most curious experiences I had of the native artistic instinct of Japan occurred in this way: I had got a number of fan-holders, and was busying myself one afternoon arranging them upon the walls. My little Japanese servant-boy was in the room, and as I went on with my work I caught an expression on his face from time to time which showed me that he was not overpleased with my performance. After a while, as this dissatisfied expression seemed to deepen, I asked him what the matter was. Then he frankly confessed that he did not like the way in which I was arranging my fan-holders. 'Why did you not tell me so at once?' I asked. 'You are an artist from England,' he replied, 'and it was not for me to speak.' However, I persuaded him to arrange the fan-holders himself after his own taste, and I must say that I received a remarkable lesson. The task took him about two hours--placing, arranging, adjusting; and when he had finished, the result was simply beautiful. That wall was a perfect picture: every fan-holder seemed to be exactly in its right place, and it looked as if the alteration of a single one would affect and disintegrate the whole scheme. I accepted the lesson with due humility, and remained more than ever convinced that the Japanese are what they have justly claimed to be--an essentially artistic people, instinct with living art."



[h=2]CHAPTER IV[/h] [h=3]THE JAPANESE BOY[/h] A Japanese boy is the monarch of the household. Japan is thoroughly Eastern in the position which it gives to women. The boy, and afterwards the man, holds absolute rule over sister or wife. It is true that the upper classes in Japan are beginning to take a wider view of such matters. Women of wealthy families are well educated, wear Western dress, and copy Western manners. They sit at table with their husbands, enter a room or a carriage before them, and are treated as English women are treated by English men. But in the middle and lower classes the old state of affairs still remains: the woman is a servant pure and simple. It is said that even among the greatest families the old customs are still observed in private. The great lady who is treated in her Western dress just as her Western sister is treated takes pride in waiting on her husband when they return to kimono and obi, just as her grandmother did.


The importance of the male in Japan arises from the religious customs of the country. The chief of the latter is ancestor-worship. The ancestors of a family form its household gods; but only the male ancestors are worshipped: no offerings are ever laid on the shelf of the household gods before an ancestress. Property, too, passes chiefly in the male line, and every Japanese father is eager to have a son who shall continue the worship of his ancestors, and to whom his property may descend.


Thus, the birth of a son is received with great joy in a Japanese household; though, on the other hand, we must not think that a girl is ill-treated, or even destroyed, as sometimes happens in China. Not at all; she is loved and petted just as much as her brother, but she is not regarded as so important to the family line.


At the age of three the Japanese boy is taken to the temple to give thanks to the gods. Again, at the age of five, he goes to the temple, once more to return thanks. Now he is wearing the hakama, the manly garment, and begins to feel himself quite a man. From this age onwards the Japanese boy among the wealthier classes is kept busily at work in school until he is ready to go to the University, but among the poorer classes he often begins to work for his living.


The clever work executed by most tiny children is a matter of wonder and surprise to all European travellers. Little boys are found binding books, making paper lanterns and painting them, making porcelain cups, winding grass ropes which are hung along the house-fronts for the first week of the year to prevent evil spirits from entering, weaving mats to spread over the floors, and at a hundred other occupations. It is very amusing to watch the practice of the little boys who are going to be dentists. In Japan the dentist of the people fetches out an aching tooth with thumb and finger, and will pluck it out as surely as any tool can do the work, so his pupils learn their trade by trying to pull nails out of a board. They begin with tin-tacks, and go on until they can, with thumb and finger, pluck out a nail firmly driven into the wood.


Luckily for them, they often get a holiday. The Japanese have many festivals, when parents and children drop their work to go to some famous garden or temple for a day's pleasure. Then there is the great boys' festival, the Feast of Flags, held on the fifth day of the fifth month. Of this festival we shall speak again.


Every Japanese boy is taught that he owes the strictest duty to his parents and to his Emperor. These duties come before all others in Japanese eyes. Whatever else he may neglect, he never forgets these obligations. From infancy he is familiar with stories in which children are represented as doing the most extraordinary things and undergoing the greatest hardships in order to serve their parents. There is one famous old book called "Twenty-four Paragons of Filial Virtue." It gives instances of the doings of good sons, and is very popular in every Japanese household.


Professor Chamberlain, the great authority on Japan, quotes some of these instances, and they seem to us rather absurd. He says: "One of the paragons had a cruel stepmother who was very fond of fish. Never grumbling at her harsh treatment of him, he lay down naked on the frozen surface of the lake. The warmth of his body melted a hole in the ice, at which two carp came up to breathe. These he caught and set before his stepmother. Another paragon, though of tender years and having a delicate skin, insisted on sleeping uncovered at night, in order that the mosquitoes should fasten on him alone, and allow his parents to slumber undisturbed.
"A third, who was very poor, determined to bury his own child alive in order to have more food wherewith to support his aged mother, but was rewarded by Heaven with the discovery of a vessel filled with gold, off which the whole family lived happily ever after. But the drollest of all is the story of Roraishi. This paragon, though seventy years old, used to dress in baby's clothes and sprawl about upon the floor. His object was to delude his parents, who were really over ninety years of age, into the idea that they could not be so very old, after all, seeing that they still had such a childlike son."


His duty to his Emperor the Japanese takes very seriously, for it includes his duty to his country. He considers that his life belongs to his country, and he is not only willing, but proud, to give it in her defence. This was seen to the full in the late war with Russia. Time and again a Japanese regiment was ordered to go to certain death. Not a man questioned the order, not a man dreamed for an instant of disobedience. Forward went the line, until every man had been smitten down, and the last brave throat had shouted its last shrill "Banzai!" This was the result of teaching every boy in Japan that the most glorious thing that can happen to him is to die for his Emperor and his native land.



[h=2]CHAPTER V[/h] [h=3]THE JAPANESE GIRL[/h] The word "obedience" has a large part in the life of a Japanese boy; it is the whole life of a Japanese girl. From her babyhood she is taught the duty of obeying some one or other among her relations. There is an old book studied in every Japanese household and learned by heart by every Japanese girl, called "Onra-Dai-Gaku"--that is, the "Greater Learning for Women." It is a code of morals for girls and women, and it starts by saying that every woman owes three obediences: first, while unmarried, to her father; second, when married, to her husband and the elders of his family; third, when a widow, to her son.


Up to the age of three the Japanese girl baby has her head shaved in various fancy patterns, but after three years old the hair is allowed to grow to its natural length. Up to the age of seven she wears a narrow obi of soft silk, the sash of infancy; but at seven years old she puts on the stiff wide obi, tied with a huge bow, and her dress from that moment is womanly in every detail. She is now a musume, or moosme, the Japanese girl, one of the merriest, brightest little creatures in the world. She is never big, for when at her full height she will be about four feet eight inches tall, and a Japanese woman of five feet high is a giantess.


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GOING TO THE TEMPLE


This is her time to wear gay, bright colours, for as a married woman she must dress very soberly. A party of moosmes tripping along to a feast or a fair looks like a bed of brilliant flowers set in motion. They wear kimonos of rich silks and bright shades, kimonos of vermilion and gold, of pink, of blue, of white, decorated with lovely designs of apple-blossom, of silk crape in luminous greens and golden browns, every shade of the rainbow being employed, but all in harmony and perfect taste. If a shower comes on and they tuck up their gaily-coloured and embroidered kimonos, they look like a bed of poppies, for each shows a glowing scarlet under-kimono, or petticoat.


Not only is this the time for the Japanese girl to be gaily dressed, but it is her time to visit fairs and temples, and to enjoy the gaieties which may fall in her way: for when she marries, the gates which lead to the ways of pleasure are closed against her for a long time. The duties of a Japanese wife keep her strictly at home, until the golden day dawns when her son marries and she has a daughter-in-law upon whom she may thrust all the cares of the household. Then once more she can go to temples and theatres, fairs and festivals, while another drudges in her stead.


Marriage is early in Japan. A girl marries at sixteen or seventeen, and to be unmarried at twenty is accounted a great misfortune. At marriage she completely severs herself from her own relations, and joins her husband's household. This is shown in a very striking fashion by the bride wearing a white kimono, the colour of mourning; and more, when she has left her father's house, fires of purification are lighted, just as if a dead body had been borne to the grave. This is to signify that henceforward the bride is dead to her old home, and her whole life must now be spent in the service of her husband and his relations.


The wedding rites are very simple. There is no public function, as in England, and no religious ceremony; the chief feature is that the bride and bridegroom drink three times in turn from three cups, each cup having two spouts. These cups are filled with sak, the national strong drink of Japan, a kind of beer made from rice. This drinking is supposed to typify that henceforth they will share each other's joys and sorrows, and this sipping of sak constitutes the marriage ceremony.


The young wife now must bid farewell to her fine clothes and her merry-making. She wears garments of a soft dove colour, or greys or fawns, quiet shades, but often of great charm. She has now to rise first in the morning, to open the shutters which have closed the house for the night, for this is a duty she may not leave to the servants. If her husband's father and mother dwell in the same house, she must consider it an honour to supply all their wants, and she is expected to become a perfect slave to her mother-in-law. It is not uncommon for a meek little wife, who has obeyed every one, to become a perfect tyrant as a mother-in-law, ordering her son's wife right and left, and making the younger woman's life a sheer misery. The mother-in-law has escaped from the land of bondage. It is no longer her duty to rise at dawn and open the house; she can lie in bed, and be waited upon by the young wife; she is free to go here and there, and she does not let her chances slip; she begins once more to thoroughly enjoy life.


It may be doubted, however, whether these conditions will hold their own against the flood of Western customs and Western views which has begun to flow into Japan. At present the deeply-seated ideas which rule home-life are but little shaken in the main, but it is very likely that the modern Japanese girl will revolt against this spending of the best years of her life as an upper and unpaid servant to her husband's friends and relations. But at the present moment, for great sections of Japanese society, the old ways still stand, and stand firmly.
It was formerly the custom for a woman to make herself as ugly as possible when she was married. This was to show that she wished to draw no attention from anyone outside her own home. As a rule she blackened her teeth, which gave her a hideous appearance when she smiled. This custom is now dying out, though plenty of women with blackened teeth are still to be seen.


Should a Japanese wife become a widow, she is expected to show her grief by her desolate appearance. She shaves her head, and wears garments of the most mournful look. It has been said that a Japanese girl has the look of a bird of Paradise, the Japanese wife of a dove, and the Japanese widow of a crow.


Source : http://www.gutenberg.org/files/7936/7936-h/7936-h.htm#ii
 

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