Most Common Questions asked by Non-Muslims

zaman

MPA (400+ posts)
Question: Why is a man allowed to have more than one wife in Islam? i.e. why is polygamy allowed in Islam?





Answer:

Definition of Polygamy

1. Polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygyny where a man marries more than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more than one man. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited.

Now coming to the original question, why is a man allowed to have more than one wife?


2. TheQuran is the only religious scripture in the world that says,"marry only one".


The Quran is the only religious book, on the face of this earth, that contains the phrase marry only one. There is no other religious book that instructs men to have only one wife. In none of the other religious scriptures, whether it be the Vedas, the Ramayan, the Mahabharat, the Geeta, the Talmud or the Bible does one find a restriction on the number of wives. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. It was only later, that the Hindu priests and the Christian Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Many Hindu religious personalities, according to their scriptures, had multiple wives. King Dashrat, the father of Rama, had more than one wife. Krishna had several wives.

In earlier times, Christian men were permitted as many wives as they wished, since the Bible puts no restriction on the number of wives. It was only a few centuries ago that the Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Polygyny is permitted in Judaism. According to Talmudic law, Abraham had three wives, and Solomon had hundreds of wives. The practice of polygyny continued till Rabbi Gershom ben Yehudah (95% C.E to 1030 C.E) issued an edict against it. The Jewish Sephardic communities living in Muslim countries continued the practice till as late as 1950, until an Act of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel extended the ban on marrying more than one wife.


3. Hindus are more polygynous than Muslims


The report of the Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66 and 67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the years 1951 and 1961 was 5.06% among the Hindus and only 4.31% among the Muslims. According to Indian law only Muslim men are permitted to have more than one wife. It is illegal for any non-Muslim in India to have more than one wife. Despite it being illegal, Hindus have more multiple wives as compared to Muslims. Earlier, there was no restriction even on Hindu men with respect to the number of wives allowed. It was only in 1954, when the Hindu Marriage Act was passed that it became illegal for a Hindu to have more than one wife. At present it is the Indian Law that restricts a Hindu man from having more than one wife and not the Hindu scriptures.

Let us now analyse why Islam allows a man to have more than one wife.


4. Quran permits limited polygyny


As I mentioned earlier, Quran is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says marry only one. The context of this phrase is the following verse from Surah Nisa of the Glorious Quran:

"Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one."

[Al-Quran 4:3]

Before the Quran was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygyny and many men had scores of wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or four women, only on the condition that he deals justly with them.

In the same chapter i.e. Surah Nisa verse 129 says:

"Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women...."

[Al-Quran 4:129]

Therefore polygyny is not a rule but an exception. Many people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim man to have more than one wife.

Broadly, Islam has five categories of Dos and Donts:

i. Fard i.e. compulsory or obligatory

ii. Mustahab i.e. recommended or encouraged

iii. Mubah i.e. permissible or allowed

iv. Makruh i.e. not recommended or discouraged

v. Haraam i.e. prohibited or forbidden

Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife.


5. Average life span of females is more than that of males


By nature males and females are born in approximately the same ratio. A female child has more immunity than a male child. A female child can fight the germs and diseases better than the male child. For this reason, during the pediatric age itself there are more deaths among males as compared to the females.

During wars, there are more men killed as compared to women. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers.


6. India has more male population than female due to female foeticide and infanticide


India is one of the few countries, along with the other neighbouring countries, in which the female population is less than the male population. The reason lies in the high rate of female infanticide in India, and the fact that more than one million female foetuses are aborted every year in this country, after they are identified as females. If this evil practice is stopped, then India too will have more females as compared to males.


7. World female population is more than male population


In the USA, women outnumber men by 7.8 million. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. Germany has five million more females as compared to males. Russia has nine million more females than males. God alone knows how many million more females there are in the whole world as compared to males.


8. Restricting each and every man to have only one wife is not practical


Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband.

Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes public property. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first.

In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honourable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life.

Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second.

There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.


Why does Islam degrade women by keeping them behind the veil?
Answer:
The status of women in Islam is often the target of attacks in the secular media. The hijab or the Islamic dress is cited by many as an example of the subjugation of women under Islamic law. Before we analyze the reasoning behind the religiously mandated hijab, let us first study the status of women in societies before the advent of Islam.

1. In the past women were degraded and used as objects of lust
The following examples from history amply illustrate the fact that the status of women in earlier civilizations was very low to the extent that they were denied basic human dignity:

1. Babylonian Civilization:
The women were degraded and were denied all rights under the Babylonian law. If a man murdered a woman, instead of him being punished, his wife was put to death.
2. Greek Civilization:
Greek Civilization is considered the most glorious of all ancient civilizations. Under this very glorious system, women were deprived of all rights and were looked down upon. In Greek mythology, an imaginary woman called Pandora is the root cause of misfortune of human beings. The Greeks considered women to be subhuman and inferior to men. Though chastity of women was precious, and women were held in high esteem, the Greeks were later overwhelmed by ego and sexual perversions. Prostitution became a regular practice amongst all classes of Greek society.
3. Roman Civilization:
When Roman Civilization was at the zenith of its glory, a man even had the right to take the life of his wife. Prostitution and nudity were common amongst the Romans.
4. Egyptian Civilization:
The Egyptian considered women evil and as a sign of a devil.
5. Pre-Islamic Arabia:
Before Islam spread in Arabia, the Arabs looked down upon women and very often when a female child was born, she was buried alive.
2. Islam uplifted women and gave them equality and expects them to maintain their status.
Islam uplifted the status of women and granted them their just rights 1400 years ago. Islam expects women to maintain their status.
Hijab for men
People usually only discuss hijab in the context of women. However, in the Glorious Quran, Allah (swt) first mentions hijab for men before hijab for the women. The Quran mentions in Surah Noor:
"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do." [Al-Quran 24:30]
The moment a man looks at a woman and if any brazen or unashamed thought comes to his mind, he should lower his gaze.
Hijab for women.
The next verse of Surah Noor, says:
" And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands fathers, their sons..." [Al-Quran 24:31]
3. Six criteria for Hijab.
According to Quran and Sunnah there are basically six criteria for observing hijab:
1. Extent:
The first criterion is the extent of the body that should be covered. This is different for men and women. The extent of covering obligatory on the male is to cover the body at least from the navel to the knees. For women, the extent of covering obligatory is to cover the complete body except the face and the hands upto the wrist. If they wish to, they can cover even these parts of the body. Some scholars of Islam insist that the face and the hands are part of the obligatory extent of hijab.
All the remaining five criteria are the same for men and women.
2. The clothes worn should be loose and should not reveal the figure.
3. The clothes worn should not be transparent such that one can see through them.
4. The clothes worn should not be so glamorous as to attract the opposite sex.
5. The clothes worn should not resemble that of the opposite sex.
6. The clothes worn should not resemble that of the unbelievers i.e. they should not wear clothes that are specifically identities or symbols of the unbelievers religions.
4. Hijab includes conduct and behaviour among other things
Complete hijab, besides the six criteria of clothing, also includes the moral conduct, behaviour, attitude and intention of the individual. A person only fulfilling the criteria of hijab of the clothes is observing hijab in a limited sense. Hijab of the clothes should be accompanied by hijab of the eyes, hijab of the heart, hijab of thought and hijab of intention. It also includes the way a person walks, the way a person talks, the way he behaves, etc.
5. Hijab prevents molestation
The reason why Hijab is prescribed for women is mentioned in the Quran in the following verses of Surah Al-Ahzab:
"O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women that they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad); that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." [Al-Quran 33:59]
The Quran says that Hijab has been prescribed for the women so that they are recognized as modest women and this will also prevent them from being molested.
6. Example of twin sisters
Suppose two sisters who are twins, and who are equally beautiful, walk down the street. One of them is attired in the Islamic hijab i.e. the complete body is covered, except for the face and the hands up to the wrists. The other sister is wearing western clothes, a mini skirt or shorts. Just around the corner there is a hooligan or ruffian who is waiting for a catch, to tease a girl. Whom will he tease? The girl wearing the Islamic Hijab or the girl wearing the skirt or the mini? Naturally he will tease the girl wearing the skirt or the mini. Such dresses are an indirect invitation to the opposite sex for teasing and molestation. The Quran rightly says that hijab prevents women from being molested.
7. Capital punishment for the rapists
Under the Islamic shariah, a man convicted of having raped a woman, is given capital punishment. Many are astonished at this harsh sentence. Some even say that Islam is a ruthless, barbaric religion! I have asked a simple question to hundreds of non-Muslim men. Suppose, God forbid, someone rapes your wife, your mother or your sister. You are made the judge and the rapist is brought in front of you. What punishment would you give him? All of them said they would put him to death. Some went to the extent of saying they would torture him to death. To them I ask, if someone rapes your wife or your mother you want to put him to death. But if the same crime is committed on somebody elses wife or daughter you say capital punishment is barbaric. Why should there be double standards?
8. Western society falsely claims to have uplifted women
Western talk of womens liberalization is nothing but a disguised form of exploitation of her body, degradation of her soul, and deprivation of her honour. Western society claims to have uplifted women. On the contrary it has actually degraded them to the status of concubines, mistresses and society butterflies who are mere tools in the hands of pleasure seekers and sex marketeers, hidden behind the colourful screen of art and culture.
9. USA has one of the highest rates of rape
United States of America is supposed to be one of the most advanced countries of the world. It also has one of the highest rates of rape in any country in the world. According to a FBI report, in the year 1990, every day on an average 1756 cases of rape were committed in U.S.A alone. Later another report said that on an average everyday 1900 cases of rapes are committed in USA. The year was not mentioned. May be it was 1992 or 1993. May be the Americans got bolder in the following years.
Consider a scenario where the Islamic hijab is followed in America. Whenever a man looks at a woman and any brazen or unashamed thought comes to his mind, he lowers his gaze. Every woman wears the Islamic hijab, that is the complete body is covered except the face and the hands up to the wrist. After this if any man commits rape he is given capital punishment. I ask you, in such a scenario, will the rate of rape in America increase, will it remain the same, or will it decrease?
10. Implementation of Islamic Sharee'ah will reduce the rate of rapes
Naturally as soon as Islamic Sharee'ah is implemented positive results will be inevitable. If Islamic Sharee'ah is implemented in any part of the world, whether it is America or Europe, society will breathe easier. Hijab does not degrade a woman but uplifts a woman and protects her modesty and chastity.




AS PUBLISHED IN SIASAT




 

Raaz

(50k+ posts) بابائے فورم
So long answer for the small question that Why Muslims are allowed 4 marriages.

The answer is simple.

Because we do not have any other thing to do.

Eat a lot and no job , so how we could spend time????
 

shah5ap

Senator (1k+ posts)
Kissi aur baat per tawaja na dena, Bas shadiyon per zoor aur bachey peda karna hi hamara mashgala reh giya hay, Aur iss k bad kahney peney k bhi ham maher hen.
Bhai! aur bhi gam hen zamaney may muhabbat k sewa.
 

Truth_Hurts

Politcal Worker (100+ posts)
So long answer for the small question that Why Muslims are allowed 4 marriages.

The answer is simple.

Because we do not have any other thing to do.

Eat a lot and no job , so how we could spend time????

Now here are the people who instead of learning from a good answer given by Zaman are going to argue beacause fitna is in the mind 24/7. They can never see people learn or get along well.. Astagfarullah..

Thanks for the post, you gave good answers but just for the readers that when you are giving answers don't start giving answer by comparing all religion unless you have the certain relationship created with the person you are talking to. The answers or the explainations given in this post are really good, use them before saying that hindu's have done this and jews have done that.. just because our aim should be to teach other people not fight or argue without any reason, but if they still don't understand then you can say ok lets compare islamic law with the other religion. Also the reason i am saying is that because christians and hindus can argue that yes we had that law but that was long ago now we have evolved, and so should you.. therefore comparing how they were might go against you.
 

Raaz

(50k+ posts) بابائے فورم
Now here are the people who instead of learning from a good answer given by Zaman are going to argue beacause fitna is in the mind 24/7. They can never see people learn or get along well.. Astagfarullah..

Thanks for the post, you gave good answers but just for the readers that when you are giving answers don't start giving answer by comparing all religion unless you have the certain relationship created with the person you are talking to. The answers or the explainations given in this post are really good, use them before saying that hindu's have done this and jews have done that.. just because our aim should be to teach other people not fight or argue without any reason, but if they still don't understand then you can say ok lets compare islamic law with the other religion. Also the reason i am saying is that because christians and hindus can argue that yes we had that law but that was long ago now we have evolved, and so should you.. therefore comparing how they were might go against you.

Good advice.

But look at my words , I just make fun and criticized my nation according to present situation.

There is joke, ( jus for fun only , but meaning full)

During a census in pakistan , a team went door to door to find out data of population.

They knocked at one door , a man of age 30 came out and answered the queastion like that.

Q: The name of owner of house.
A: told fathers's name
Q: how many children he has?
A: 8
Q: else live in this house?
A: Me
Q: how many kids you have?
A: 6

Q: What you people do ( occupation)
A: Only we make kids.(بس یہی کرتے ہیں )


The real answer is different for different back ground of people.

For example , for christian and Jews,If we tell them that Hazrat David AS has 99 wives. they will not ask any more.( it is in quran ).

Actually , one wife is recommended for us.

Very clear from the life of Hazrat Muhammad AS

He did marriage with 40 years old , two times widow woman , (Our mother RA)

and up to her life , he did not married, even think about it, though he was young and Arrabs has tradition of having more than one wife, definitely.

This pattern we should follow.

The rest of his wives have different situation.(RA)

That is demand of prophethood in that situation , to spread the message and knowledge , more and more.
 
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Raaz

(50k+ posts) بابائے فورم
Kissi aur baat per tawaja na dena, Bas shadiyon per zoor aur bachey peda karna hi hamara mashgala reh giya hay, Aur iss k bad kahney peney k bhi ham maher hen.
Bhai! aur bhi gam hen zamaney may muhabbat k sewa.

And we call Alim deen to tat person , who tells how to divorce ? and how to do Iddat and fight for Khatam at death.

Half are saying it is good to do , half say it is bad ...

That is our Alim today.
 

shah5ap

Senator (1k+ posts)
Deen ko mazak banya hay. Dokanen kol reken hen aur chal raheen hen. Alim e deen eek hi masley ko mukhtalif makatib e fikr ki mehfelon may mukhtalif andaz hi say nahi belkay mehfil ka rang deek kar masley bayan(Explain) kartey hen aur asliat ko pas e pusht dal detey hen. Bool jatey hen k eek din Allah ko Jawab bhi dena hay.